Before you go on with the reading,

She's making her own way. With Allah by her side.


If you don't mind, read this blog from the first post. But If you mind, don't basically judge if you don't know what happened before :)

dan kisah penulis yang panjang hikayatnya di sini : kaishrakirana.
Salam.


July 10, 2013

.50. Reminding Ramadhan.



...

 Julai 2013. 
Spent my weekends in the studio. Saturday family came to visit in Gombak, Relieved, I am. 
Isnin lepas presentation pertama (Critic Session).
Semester ini subjectnya adalah Multi Disciplinary (Multi Dip) , kira macam konon konon office job, bercampur antara architects, designers and surveyors. An interesting studio class I shall say.
Sibuk. But I am enjoying it EnsyaAllah.

Ini adalah few updates. I got lost with my words.

1. For the past few days, balik bilik dari studio lepas subuh. Harap prestasi Ramadhan tak tergugat dengan keadaan begini. Harap badan mampu tahan.

2. Hari isnin, pulang ke bilik pukul 8.00+ am, and need to get back to the studio for presentation at 9.00am+ . Unfortunately tertidur until exactly 8.58 am. Hanya tuhan yang tahu perasaan perasaan rasa nak terbang ke studio tanpa perlu berjalan terkedek kedek, when time like this comes.

3. Mimpi berada di medan Rabiah Adawiyah di Mesir. Mursi was in front me. Everyone was chanting with full spirit. That dream feels so real, and until the time I have to wake up, I resisted. I wanted to be there. The vibe is , masyaAllah. Strong enough. I was in the middle of ocean of people, ikhawanul Muslimin. I bet this is due to what I read and digest most, before I sleep. From the updates that I get virtually. O' Allah, adakah tempat untuk aku untuk menjadi syuhada' di jalan mu? Do you look at me, as I am begging for your mercy and attention 24/7? Allah Allah.

4. Been looking to images of the martyrs, the innocent people got killed. Allahu, I am sure they are waiting in Jannah. Their pictures look like they are smiling and sleeping peacefully. In fact, dunya is a prison for real Mukmin, and to be free is to die in the blessing of Allah. Khusnul Khotimah.

5. 
Orang kafirun sangat takut pada semangat juang anak muda Islam yang tak takut mati, kerana takut mereka hanyalah pada Allah. That's what scared them most. The Zionist, takut mati. Perjuangan mereka adalah untuk hidup, sedangkan perjuangan the real Mukmin, adalah untuk mati syahid dan mendapat Mardhatillah. Different kan? Hebat.

6. When people see, how many innocent civilians, muslims are being killed across the world ; I do have in mind, they are waiting in Jannah.

Jika kamu ingat orang yang syahid itu mati, sebenarnya mereka tidak mati. (I can't remember which ayah in Quran, but yeah, it is stated there)

They live longer happily. sedangkan hidup dan mati kita bagaimana?

To feel sad for them is normal, but to strive to have a high iman like them, is A must!
kita patut lebih risau dan sedih dengan keadaan diri,, yang diulit kesenangan, our own comfort zone, dan selalu lalai dan leka in remembering Allah.

Kerana itu, ujian kita tidak seperti mereka di sana, yang mana kalau kebergantungan tidak pada tahap PALING TINGGI dengan ALLAH, mereka takkan bertahan. Kalau kita? ah Kalau aku sendiri? ahh jatuh bergolek.


7.  Presiden Morsi pernah menyuarakan dengan lantang dan beraninya di khalayak tentang putusnya hubungan dengan Regim Bassar Al Assad di Syria, and soon after that terus macam macam 'hal' menimpa Mesir.

Akan ada orang yang terfikir dan berkata, "Itulah sape suruh tak sokong kuasa besar, kan dah berantakan negaranya"

but indeed,, kita patut revise diri kita sendiri, KUASA SIAPAKAH PALING BESAR? Memang, perjuangan menegakkan hak dan batil itu teramatlah susah. But it takes courage and bravery to do so.

Don't ever have doubt atas janji janji Allah. If not for HIM we believe, makanya pada siapa?!

8. dan masyarakat Muslim yang semakin hampir tiba Ramadhan diuji lagi, Ramadhan itu bulan keraian.

Jika hadiah hadiah dan rahmat tuhan yang diganda gandakan in the month of Ramadhan boleh dilihat dengan mata kasar, Pasti, semua berlari merebutnya. Lagi lagi, bila kita diuji, kita sabar dengan ujian itu, dan makin hampir pada Allah, maka gandaannya lebih lebih berlipat ganda, bukan?

Hanya yang melihat dengan hati, mampu melihat rahmat berjurai jatuh membasah bumi. Maka, ini pesan aku untuk aku sendiri dan untuk kamu, lets strive for the best in the month of Ramadhan. Me myself a little bit worried, kerana semenjak tarbiyyah membasah diri, this will be my first Ramadhan in UIA, with classes and busy with projects.

Allahu Musta'an.

Let Allah give ease to us. To achieve the best account of deeds in the month of Ramadhan.

9. Maybe, I am a little bit worried of how I will perform in this Ramadhan, since I will be busy with projects, meetings and stuffs. But something knocked me, and I am ready for this year around, since I knew, that I have to be away from home this time, since years ago. I do hope, persiapan dari dulu dulu, adalah bekal nya walau pun luaknya ibarat secalit sisa makanan yang terlalu sedikit, aku harap ada.

Sungguh, perisai iman adalah paling penting di saat ini.  It is battle between me and me! Nafs'

To look something positively, I have to admit tak selamanya, that I will be at home in Ramadhan, as the years go ahead, I shall have my own life, my own duty, job and etc, and I shall be prepared for that. Life will never become easier, In fact it will become even more challenging. But only to Allah, I shall  beg for HIM to give ease in everything.

And I honestly to the utmost level of gratitude and thankful to Allah swt, for making me going through some bits of life, and make me recognize my own mistakes and faults, even in fact, when I was "so baby" in learning back about my faith, gaining back HIS attention to me, finding HIS path in the hardest way, HE gave me time, to slow slow and slowly come back to HIM, have the Holy Month straight away. and much more, that I shall keep between me and HIM. For that, I hope, O' Allah, I hope you are happy with me, though I am no one. I am just a minute servant of yours. For your love, I shall have in my heart most.

Every Ramadhan, has its own story. Alhamdulillah.
'O Allah, please please please, make this Ramadhan Kareem the best for us than before. Let us grab all the chances to fill up our account of good deeds to cover up the account of bad deeds, that we have been filling up all these years.




Lets ponder upon this!



"I have to much to say, and I am aware, that I will be tested for what I write, I speak, I believe and what I love most. 
Contoh; jika kita kata I LOVE ALLAH, akan ada ujian to really test us whether do we really LOVE HIM, Ready too sacrifice for HIM atau sekadar cogan kata tampal pada pelekat sticker kereta." - Maryam.

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