Before you go on with the reading,

She's making her own way. With Allah by her side.


If you don't mind, read this blog from the first post. But If you mind, don't basically judge if you don't know what happened before :)

Sincerely,
Mrym.

June 4, 2013

039. Tiga sekaligus.


Assalammualaikum. wbt.

selalu, dalam setiap penceritaan sebuah buku atau filem di layar,
kita sebagai penonton mengharapkan
ianya disudahkan dengan baik.

"a happy ending"

tapi tidak semua yang nampak seperti "happy"
bersifat
"happy" sebenarnya.

mungkin sebuah kematian yang tragik
atau rintik rintik hujan yang melankolik
boleh jadi

erti kata lain untuk
mensimbolkan

"a happy ending"


ianya berbeza
beza.

Bagi aku, biarlah ianya adalah
"Beautiful ending"

walau seburuk mana
atau sehitam mana sesuatu keadaan
ditunjukkan dalam wayang gambar
atau penulisan,

sebuah pengakhiran yang cantik,
itulah yang kita mahukan.
mungkin di mata manusia biasa,

seperti aku,

yang buruk itu,
tetap buruk pada mata DIA.

tapi dalam rahsia,
DIA sebenarnya
ada berjuta juta rancang untuk hidup seorang aku
dan sekelompok kalian.



Bersabar lah.

Bukan kah Khusnul Khotimah itu lebih baik?
Itulah pengakhiran terbaik
hidup di ruang fana
sebelum kekal abadi

di sana nanti.

Ini yang in the previous post I told about giving presentation to kids. Blessed Indeed.
nervous dan gementar hanya lah di minda.
managed to overcome and enjoyed the time with them.
Alhamdulillah.
...


Maryam, kenapa ini. kenapa?
I have to remind myself,
not to put myself in the comfort zone.

Struggle is there, every day
every now and then.
Not only, when I was in the gloomy days
of searching
the true Hidayah of Allah.


It shall stay.
It shall.

As long as, I'm living
and breathing,

La ila ha ilallah.

Was taken after Pesta Buku 2012. After I met Kak Aishah. Hibernated in KLCC's Mosque from Asr' til Isya'
I can still remember who I have texted along the journey.
I can still remember what I said to Kak Aishah.
I can still remember all the heart issues I had during this exact time.
but most of all,
the memory of contemplating to put on the niqab and went back to Gombak after hours of thinking and waiting.
Precious.
Time of being lonely with HIM.

...

Been having many lines and words in my head.
Storylines of stories to be put up
nicely.

But God, why I always restrain myself of doing so?
Or is it just me
who keeps on
procrastinating.

until when.
until when.

1. "tentang aku dan teman baik aku"
2. "bukan macam pergi cari beg atau kasut"
...


Sepenuh rasa dan jiwa, aku redha atas segala yang sakit dan yang bahagia
tuhan telah tentukan.

But as the days,
approaching why
heart starts to beat wildly.
mind starts to have high curiosity.

I wonder.

But please, Allah,
I have set my aim high.
I have buried down my past.
I have started a to write on a new chapter.
Please, don't drag me to the stories of yesterday.

Mungkin, inilah akibat,
tidak menamatkan sesuatu dengan sebaiknya.

Mungkin, bila jauh dan tak bersemuka,
semua lantang bicara dan berani saja,
tapi apa jadi
bila keduanya
saling berhadapan,
saling membisu atau ada kata kata yang baik untuk diucapkan
antara satu sama lain.

Sudah lah.

Semoga segalanya elok saja
dan dipermudahkan.
Jika ada yang boleh dielak,
semoga dapat dielak.



and this is Bukit Tabur' view from KAED building level four. it is just a relieve
to look at this, whenever I am tired with my studio works.

...

Ini perkongsian

Bukan Tol.
Artikel Rising Islam.
Magiknya Tarbiyyah.

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